I LOVE YOU arc
by Veste Notus
Summary: Duo and Heero slowly come to their senses and realize, however slowly, how they feel about each other... surprise twist at the end! 5 part arc!
1. If Only in a Lullaby

Disclaimers: Gundam Wing and all other related titles and characters do not belong to me. They belong to the more gifted. *wistful sigh* Pairings: 1+2 Warnings: angst, mild language, attempted suicide(?) Notes: Written for the 1X2X1 ML, this fic is something special to me.  
  
Fic inspired by my usual fanfic-writing BGMs - Greenbird, Memory, Adieu, and Requiem for a Dream.  
  
I LOVE YOU, If Only in a Lullaby By Veste Notus  
  
Duo rolled over for the seventeenth time. He was sick and tired of not being able to get to sleep. It was just too godamn hot out. Even though Christmas was approaching, the climate control of the colony was set to be on 'early summer' mode, a fact that strongly irritated the Deathscythe pilot.  
  
He'd been living on his own for some time now, separating himself from the group as a means of better understanding himself. Duo was never very 'deep', or so he thought.  
  
Duo recounted many of the dreams he'd been having. He knew the hot weather was half the reason he couldn't sleep, but his dreams. Like a splinter in his mind, they drove him mad.  
  
Duo would wake up in a cold sweat, panting and gasping for air like a fish out of water. How long had it been since he got a *real* night's sleep?  
  
After tossing in bed for what seemed like hours, Duo finally got up. Looking out the window, he was unable to see the stars or moon through the musky, humid fog. He let out a sigh and rested his hot hand against the cooled window pane.  
  
"Shinigami is restless." he said to no one. Duo unlocked the window and opened it half way. With a swish of his braid, Duo disappeared into night, leaving everything he had behind.  
  
Far off in the distance, an ethereal soft red glow sent shivers into the humid skies. The wind blew goodbye kisses through Duo's abandoned window, sending papers awhirl and extinguishing the single dim candle on his night table.  
  
Duo perched himself on the roof of his apartment, eyes hopelessly focused on that eerie glow. He was drawn to it like a fly to a light, and with unseen wings, Duo took flight from the top floor.  
  
Duo saw the ground approach him. Duo saw his life flash before his eyes. Duo saw his world go white, and then Duo saw him.  
  
What he was doing there, Duo would never be able to tell. If he was really there was as much a mystery to Duo as the creation of the universe. The glow Duo sought was gone, replaced by metal and a sharp cold contrast to his surroundings.  
  
Wing held Duo's lifeless body an instant more before its master took him in. Heero willingly took in his braided partner, seeking an answer to a newly formed question burning on his mind.  
  
The two flew off into the bleak night. Heero found a dense forest and landed Wing. Once safe and secure, having seated Duo in Wing's chair, Heero began his interrogation.  
  
"Why did you do that, Duo?" Duo averted his eyes from Heero's. Heero only took this as a further insult and thus shook the boy rather violently. "Duo! Why the hell did you do that?!"  
  
The hurt tone didn't quite reach Duo's ears. Only anger. The only way Duo could see Heero was through his anger. Duo was deaf to the emotions, however subtle or conspicuous they might have been.  
  
"Heero, I want to fly." Heero was about to smack the smart-ass silly when he caught the seriousness in Duo's eyes. "I want to fly far from here, where war cannot reach me."  
  
"You didn't have to jump."  
  
"Due north, ten miles. There's a wildfire. You responsible?" Heero gave a nod.  
  
"Wufei too." There was an awkward silence between the two boys.  
  
"If I'd succeeded, would it matter?"  
  
"What?" Heero's eyes went wide and some indescribable emotions rushed past him. Clenching his fists until they were white knuckled, Heero gave a stoic nod. "You're important to us, Duo."  
  
"For the mission?" Duo almost sang mockingly. He spun around and advanced on the Wing pilot. "If the war was over and I jumped, would it matter?"  
  
Heero was in shock. He wanted to say 'of course it would!', but he knew what Duo was really asking. Did they have a purpose outside of war? If they survived, would the world accept them, or shun them? Heero turned away from Duo, unable to see the face of innocence and death much longer.  
  
"That's a question I wonder about myself." he threw over his shoulder.  
  
"We're a lot alike." Heero turned around in time for Duo to continue. "We act like complete opposites most of the time, but deep down," Duo trailed a finger down Heero's shoulder "deep down we're the same, you and I."  
  
Heero had seldom seen Duo this serious, and wondered if his fall was the cause. He put a hand against Duo's forehead to make sure he wasn't coming down with a hallucinogenic fever.  
  
Heero pulled his hand back the instant it touched Duo's forehead. "You're burning up!" Heero said startled.  
  
"It's hot." came the reply.  
  
"Baka." Heero scurried to find his ice-water bottle that he'd been drinking from earlier. Finding it, he placed the cool bottle to Duo's overheated forehead, swearing he could see smoke rising from it.  
  
Duo allowed himself to be taken care of. The ice-water helped cool him, a gesture for which he was very grateful.  
  
Soon Duo was teetering between consciousness and sleep. Heero had pulled back his chair so it was in a recline position, allowing Duo to lie down.  
  
Heero gently stroked Duo's hair. He hadn't known what had come over him, but the conversation they'd just had must have awakened an overprotective aspect of his subconscious. He *had* to protect Duo, no matter what the cost.  
  
He cared about Duo. Duo was his friend. Duo was the first and only person who made Heero feel like he too was cared about; like he too was needed. It was true. They were the same, deep down. Unfortunately, Heero was only just realizing that now.  
  
Gently, in his softest voice, Heero hummed a song to Duo. It started meek, but grew in volume, never above a whisper. Duo's eyes slid instantly closed and his breathing became deeper, indicating sleep.  
  
Before drifting off completely into sleep's abyss, Duo's mind dimly grasped what had transpired. Heero's sweet voice sang to him, reassuring him. Duo was not alone. The things Duo saw, the things that haunted his restless sleep. he would not have to fear them anymore. Heero was with him, and Heero would protect him. They were the same, after all.  
  
And before blacking out into a state of relaxed unconsciousness, Duo stole one last thought - that Heero did in fact care for him, if only in a lullaby.  
  
TBC 


	2. If Only in a Melody

Disclaimers: Gundam Wing and all other related titles and characters do not belong to me. They belong to the more gifted. *wistful sigh* Pairings: 1+2 Warnings: mild angst, mild language, attempted suicide(?) Notes: Fic inspired by my new fanfic-writing BGM - Blue  
  
Fic part of the 'I LOVE YOU' arc  
  
I LOVE YOU, If Only in a Melody  
  
The city lights awoke Duo from his dreams. It'd been so long since he recounted getting sleep. He let himself breathe through his mouth and exhaled the poisoned air through his nose.  
  
Coughing on a tear that had gotten its way past his defenses, Duo rolled onto his side, meeting the edge of Wing's seat. He looked up to find Heero standing in front of him, piloting his gundam while Duo rested.  
  
It had been a long day for both of them.  
  
After minutes of blue silence and red hush, Duo's fluttering eyes picked up new flavor of Heero he'd never quiet seen. Something about him.  
  
Heero's strong arms flew across panels of buttons, dials, levers. It was watching art in motion. Every move Heero made was specifically calculated, anticipated, and executed. It was like watching a grandfather clock in motion, still flawless after hundreds of years.  
  
But this. This was something different, and therefore inherently special to Duo. He saw a human nature within the mechanical movements. He smelt the robotic transmission fluid, but tasted the human sweat.  
  
For once, Duo realized who Heero was, just by watching him mutely from Wing's perspective. Heero was a human, first and foremost. He sinned like humans, he bled like humans, and he cried like humans, though the thought of Heero crying was enough to put a grin on Duo's face.  
  
"What are you smiling about?" came his callus voice.  
  
"Just thinking."  
  
"Oh? About what?" Duo never found himself in such a situation. Was Heero starting a conversation with him? He'd thought for the longest of times that Heero's main objective was to force Duo to shut the hell up.  
  
"Have you ever cried, Heero?" came the question. As he piloted Wing, back turned to face his braided partner, Heero's mouth opened and closed. He couldn't respond.  
  
After giving perhaps too much thought to the situation, Heero finally let go. Without turning around, Heero allowed Duo to catch a glimpse of the boy taken away too early; of the child no one ever knew or loved.  
  
"I had a father and mother, Duo. I had a family. A family who loved me. I had a dog, a toy airplane, and a place to come home to. I had home cooked meals made with love. I had a life that I never wanted to give away.  
  
You could say I had it all, Duo. You could say that I had everything a boy could want, but still I was not content. I was restless, Duo. I craved something more. Despite my young age, I desired to break away. I desired to be free from all that was commonplace and trite.  
  
Often times I'll wake up from a nightmare, regretting the path I took.  
  
My dog, Faith, was my only companion. I don't recall having a name, Duo. I can't remember if it was really Heero after all, or if J changed every aspect of my name.  
  
My parents took me on a company picnic. My father worked on L1's Functional Operations Team. My mother laid out the yellow and white checkered blanket, and the three of us, with Faith by my side, would eat our lovely sandwiches, the crust cut just how I like it.  
  
I had an apple from the tree we sat on. My father lifted me onto his shoulders and my mother warned me that it was too dangerous. I plucked the shiniest red apple from that great tree's branches. I polished it with my green sleeve and sank stark white teeth in its tough interior.  
  
My Faith ran away. I lived through winter. I lived through the hospital visits and the funerals.  
  
My parents died of a disease they couldn't see or catch in time. It was cholera, Duo. My colony was almost wiped out by the deadly plague that had descended upon us.  
  
When I recount that, I think of you. You must have liked L1, for Shinigami stayed by my side, replacing my Faith and giving me a false sense of hope in a time of darkness.  
  
I didn't cry when my parents died, only weeks in between one another. No. I didn't cry at their funerals.  
  
I didn't cry when Faith ran away, when I scraped my knee for the first time, or when the first bullet pierced my skin.  
  
I didn't cry when I died for the first time, at my own self-destructing hands. I didn't cry when war began, and I won't cry when it ends.  
  
I'm not callus, Duo. I promise. I've cried once, Duo.  
  
I cried when my mother sang to me. I cried when she lulled me to sleep with a haunting melody. When she parted her thin wine lips and poured from them bitter tears and song, I allowed myself to cry.  
  
Does it surprise you? I cried silently. I've never cried out loud. I suppose that's typical? It would make sense that *I* never cried out loud.  
  
I've never. never cried with anyone since my parents died. All I have now is their memory. A faded, distant, unhelpful memory that only dulls with time.  
  
I cried when I had everything and feared I couldn't keep it. I should have appreciated it while it was there. I now cry for the everything I've lost but always loved. still love.  
  
I cry for the lost dream. I cry for the freedom I've traded for the bondage I longed for as a child. I was so ready to 'break free' from whatever it was that was keeping me back that I hardly noticed the bounds chained to my wrists.  
  
I don't cry very often Duo."  
  
"I can tell Heero."  
  
Heero and Duo rested in saffron stillness for a time, registering the words Heero had just spoken. So Heero cried. He was becoming more human to Duo, so much so that Duo reached out to touch Heero's arm, ever so lightly. He was real. He was flesh and blood.  
  
His flesh was torn and his blood was spilt. They were the same. They could breathe as one, sing as one.  
  
They could fly as one.  
  
Counting the shooting stars, Duo looked out with newly opened eyes. Gradually he was discovering more and more about Heero, and therefore himself.  
  
"Heero, have you ever flown?"  
  
"I have, Duo." Heero turned around to face Duo. "But my wings have been broken long ago." Duo sat up and straightened his collar.  
  
"I flew, Heero. I flew and I cried. I laughed and I danced in the air." Heero gave a nod.  
  
"One day, I'll join you up in the clouds, Duo." Heero felt something warm on his hand.  
  
"Today, Heero?" Duo lightly squeezed Heero's hand.  
  
"I can't say, Duo. I can't say." Heero's eyes met Duo's. Instantly, he began to feel a familiar stinging behind his eyes. It was as if Duo tore down every wall he put up. Heero let the tears pass over his eyes and roll down his cheeks.  
  
Heero let himself cry. And suddenly, Heero began humming again.  
  
It was a broken hum, a light hum. It was a purple coated melody of angst and fears. When he had finished, the two boy's hands were tightly intertwined and both pairs of eyes were stained a soft blue from salt.  
  
"My mother sang that to me." Heero admitted, wrapping himself in Duo's arms.  
  
"Thank you, Heero."  
  
The lights rushed past the boys as they sat together, Wing stuck on autopilot. It did not matter where they were from or what they had seen. After stories of death and attempted suicide, that evening had been an eventful one.  
  
The boys deserved a much needed stress-relieving sleep. In one another's arms, they fell asleep again, tune on lips, song in heart.  
  
Heero wouldn't have told anyone his story. No one had ever asked before. Slowly, Duo was growing on him, and he was learning to grow on Duo as well. After his parents had died, he'd lost his dependence and reliance on anyone but himself.  
  
Heero was learning to change, be it good or bad. He simply hoped that he would not regret the path he was leaning toward taking. He did not want to be lost in his memories any longer.  
  
All this time he'd wanted to remove himself from the melody. Now he wanted to sing along with it; to dance. Now he wanted to fly.  
  
TBC 


	3. If Only in a Memory

Disclaimers: Gundam Wing and all other related titles and characters do not belong to me. They belong to the more gifted. *wistful sigh* Pairings: 1+2 Warnings: light angst, mild language, maybe some sap? Notes: Fanfic BGM - Blue - auto repeat  
  
Fic part of the 'I LOVE YOU' arc  
  
I LOVE YOU, If Only in a Memory  
  
"It's your turn, Duo."  
  
Heero and Duo had become much closer through the night. The sun's rays poured down on them, casting shadows across their faces, symbolizing the light they found in one another, yet emphasizing the shadows on both of their pasts.  
  
Duo knew Heero now. It was him who remained unknown. As Duo dipped his head down to gather white flowers in the field they sat in, Heero found the braided boy's face as hidden as ever.  
  
He'd long since acquainted himself with the idea that Duo was different from how he presented himself. There was something off in his joviality, and Heero set out to find the real Duo.  
  
"Okay, Heero. Ask away."  
  
Heero had decided that the best way to find out more about Duo was to find out more about himself. He let Duo ask him any question he wanted, given that Duo would do the same in return.  
  
Duo had asked Heero why he'd stopped him from flying.  
  
If Heero had ever been uncertain of his guess at Duo's split personalities, he didn't anymore. Duo was an interesting character indeed. There was something about him that transcended simple beauty. There was a light inside him that burned down his throat and shined like beams out his toes and fingertips.  
  
Heero told Duo what he meant to him. Heero made known to Duo that he wasn't just a 'part of the mission', but a 'part of the family'. He'd finally learned to depend on someone other than himself; a grand compliment reserved just for Duo. But now it was Duo's turn.  
  
"Tell me, Duo." Heero thumbed through a stubborn patch of grass. "What is your fondest memory?"  
  
"My fondest memory?" Heero gave a nod and nothing more. Not a smile, barely a blink. Heero feared that any emotion would influence Duo's answer. He wanted the real Duo to answer, not some manipulated, automatic mask.  
  
Sure enough, the real Duo would answer. "My fondest memory." Duo fingeres a chain around his neck. "was when I was free."  
  
Duo looked up at Heero with penetrating eyes - eyes that whispered 'that's all I had to say'. But Heero's insistent eyes retorted, demanding continuance.  
  
"You know about Sister Helen and Father Maxwell. If I tell you that story one more time, I think it'll stop holding its meaning. You know about Solo, my only friend. You know about my life, Heero, whether you know it or not.  
  
My fondest memory was when I was free. When I wasn't bound by my cross. When I wasn't a slave to war. When I wasn't Shinigami, but rather just another child reaching for the earth, still small enough to swallow in one gulp."  
  
"What happened, Duo? How were you free? Why aren't you now?"  
  
"That's more than one question, Heero."  
  
".baka."  
  
Duo stood up and toed the grassy field. He ripped up the fistful of flowers and let them fall into Heero's lap.  
  
"It's your turn. Why do you sleep with flowers under your pillow?" Heero gaped.  
  
"H-how did you-" Duo cut him off. He leaned over and gripped Heero's shoulders. Their eyes met and burned.  
  
"Answer my question, Heero."  
  
"They get rid of the smell of gunpowder."  
  
"And..?" prodded Duo, hands still gripping the Japanese boy's shoulders.  
  
"And they're lilacs." Heero swallowed, recounting his memory before sharing it. "Before the outbreak, we used to have lilac bushes outside my front yard. Faith and I would play by them all the time.  
  
My mother would pick the sweetest smelling sprig and slip it under my pillow while I slept. She said it would give me sweet dreams."  
  
Duo released his hold on Heero. "So you use them."  
  
"To ward off the nightmares, Duo." Heero glanced up at Duo. "You only had to ask. I would share with you." Duo flushed crimson, knowing he'd been caught.  
  
Once, when Heero and Duo were assigned to the same mission, Duo had been awakened by a dreadful nightmare, only to turn his head to see the boy in the next bed sleeping as peacefully as a cherub. Duo was flustered, but then he caught the scent of something absolutely wonderful.  
  
He found the sprigs of lilac and slipped one under his pillow just as Heero had. He recalled sleeping nicely for the next four nights.  
  
"How were you free, Duo?"  
  
"I could fly, Heero. I could fly without worry or inhibition of who I would leave behind.  
  
I was free when my parents died, when I could look at the stars and the Earth and wonder dimly if I would eat that night. I was free after the Maxwell Massacre, after the death of Solo. I was finally free."  
  
"And you aren't now?" Duo stubbornly folded his arms and turned his head. Heero was cheating, after all. "Fine. Ask away."  
  
"Why are you asking me these questions?" Heero thought. Why *was* he asking Duo those questions. They were such personal metaphors that required reaching into the worst of Duo's memories and searching for something. searching for the words to make him understand.  
  
Was that it? Was it that Heero wanted to understand? Well, he knew he wanted to understand Duo, but why? Because he cared for him.  
  
But was it just that?  
  
Something was nagging, tugging away at the back of Heero's mind. It was like his subconscious knew something he didn't and was taunting him endlessly.  
  
"I want to know about you, Duo. You fascinate me." Heero shrugged. "I don't know. There's something different. I mean, when I'm with you, I feel like I need to know why you aren't smiling.  
  
I care about you, Duo. I don't know how, or to what degree, but I dearly care about you, more than anyone else. I care enough to share with you my secrets and to daring ask the same of you. I guess that's why I'm asking."  
  
Duo's hand shook as he stretched it towards Heero. Resting it on his shoulder, Duo slid his hand down the Japanese boy's arm and into his hand. ".Because you care?"  
  
"Why aren't you free, Duo?"  
  
"Because of you." Their eyes met. "I can't leave you behind. I can open my wings, I can spread them wide. I can flap my wings and feel the soft breeze, but I cannot fly."  
  
Duo embraced Heero in a gentle hug. They stayed like that for a while, until Duo finally whispered in Heero's ears, "You told me that your wings are broken?" Heero gave a modest nod. "Let me."  
  
"Please." came the shy response. Hand in hand, the two boys rose. Duo began to run, pulling Heero close behind.  
  
The two ran far off into the distance. With Heero hanging on, Duo set out to teach Heero how to fly. They jumped and skipped in the fields. They flipped and tripped and dove and slid. When at last they could not move any further, the two collapsed in a heap, side by side.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"No, Heero, thank you."  
  
"It's my turn."  
  
"Do you like me Heero?"  
  
"Yes. Do you like me?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
A pause.  
  
"Do you love me?"  
  
A longer pause.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Good. Me too."  
  
TBC 


	4. If Only in Goodbye

Disclaimers: Gundam Wing and all other related titles and characters do not belong to me. They belong to the more gifted. *wistful sigh* Pairings: 1+2 Warnings: light angst, mild language, maybe some sap? Attempted suicide.sorta. Notes: Fanfic BGM - Blue - auto repeat  
  
Fic part of the 'I LOVE YOU' arc  
  
I LOVE YOU, If Only in Goodbye  
  
"How much?"  
  
"Enough."  
  
"No. Really."  
  
Heero just rolled his eyes. He knew that the only way to win this tiny battle would be to use Duo logic. "Enough, enough."  
  
To his surprise, it worked. Duo just stared a silent response into Heero's eyes. Duo squinted ever so slightly, as Heero's figure barely managed to block out the sun behind him.  
  
Heero and Duo still sat in their grassy field, as unsure of themselves as ever, yet considerably calmer.  
  
Heero couldn't recall a time he'd been further at peace. After coming to terms with the fact that Duo was the cause, Heero felt a burden lifted off him. It was as if he'd been weighed down all those years without even knowing it, and now he felt light as a feather.  
  
He felt like he could dance, like he could soar, and he wanted never ever to go back to what he was before.  
  
Duo slumped against Heero's shoulder, showing no signs of moving from that spot.  
  
The two stayed frozen like that for a time, counting breaths and heartbeats. They unconsciously synchronized their breaths and memorized each other's scents. Heero counted the weaves in Duo's braid while Duo counted the scars on Heero's right arm alone.  
  
"Fifteen."  
  
"Twelve."  
  
"No. Ten."  
  
"I was counting your neck too." Heero laid a hand to his neck, covering the imaginary twin scars.  
  
"Duo, I think I would know." The next sound Heero made was more of a yelp. Duo tackled Heero into the grass and pinned the Japanese boy beneath him while two sharp teeth pierced the sensitive skin of his neck.  
  
Duo released his captive with a smug lick of his lips.  
  
"Twelve."  
  
"Baka."  
  
"How much?" Heero traced his two new 'scars' with his index finger.  
  
"A little more."  
  
"C'mon, Heero." came the whine.  
  
"Enough that if I died tomorrow, I would regret not kissing you today." Duo gave a weak, bittersweet smile, but then turned away.  
  
"Are you ready yet, Heero?"  
  
"Ready for what?"  
  
"Are you ready to fly away with me? You promised you would join me."  
  
"Duo. I."  
  
"Your wings aren't broken, and I'll prove it to you. Just trust me. Give me your hands and we'll fly. I want to fly away with you. Fly away from war, pain, emptiness. I want to be free."  
  
Heero was unsure of himself. "Duo. what if I fall?"  
  
"Then I too will fall. I want to be with you, Heero. I want to be a part of you. If you soar, so will I. If you fall, I will keep you company for the descent. All I'm asking for is your trust."  
  
"It's yours."  
  
"How much?"  
  
"A bit more."  
  
"Enough, enough?"  
  
"No. Beyond that."  
  
"More than a lot?"  
  
"Yes, Duo. Much more than a lot. I promise."  
  
Duo picked himself up and gave Heero a helping hand. From there, the two boys ran. They ran past the vast lake and the clear sky. They ran through the infinite blues that willingly engulfed them and made them forget.  
  
They ran through cerulean and midnight, through vivid violet and thistle. They ran until their muscles were tight and sore - their breaths: gulps for air. Stopping at a Wisteria tree, Heero looked over the edge.  
  
While he stared, Duo came up behind him and circled his arms around Heero's waist.  
  
"Are you ready, koibito?" Heero closed his eyes and inhaled Duo's familiar scent.  
  
"Always for you."  
  
And with that, the two boys clasped one another's hands and jumped. The warm wind picked up, scattering Wisteria petals to play with the flying souls.  
  
Soft pinks and purples danced through chestnut and sepia hair. Cerulean met amethyst and breaths stopped. Ever descending, the two drew close, intertwining themselves. Their lips drew closer too, yet they did not touch.  
  
"I love you."  
  
White.  
  
Heero would wake up cold, isolated, and empty amidst broken gundams and shattered lives.  
  
His skin would tear and his blood would spill. Heero would wake up to a nightmare, startling him out of his dream.  
  
Before his mind reached consciousness, he breathed a soft sigh and spilled past his lips fragments of his fading dream.  
  
"I love you too. enough to regret today not kissing you yesterday."  
  
OWARI 


	5. Epilouge If Only in Your Smile

Disclaimers: Gundam Wing and all other related titles and characters do not belong to me. They belong to the more gifted. *wistful sigh* Pairings: 1+2 Warnings: light angst, mild language, maybe some sap? Attempted suicide.sorta. Notes: Fanfic BGM - Blue - auto repeat  
  
Epilogue to the 'I LOVE YOU' arc  
  
I LOVE YOU, If Only in Your Smile  
  
Heero awoke with a start. He was having a grave amount of trouble focusing his eyes to the darkness that had splattered itself across the sky. Giving an audible grunt, he picked himself up off the cold metal floor and paced.  
  
He'd never had such a powerfully realistic dream. It was strange for Heero. He was so fully convinced that he'd opened up to Duo. He'd finally shown Duo his world, only to have it taken bitterly away from him like everything else he'd ever had. Heero quickly ran a hand over where his dream Duo had bitten him. The skin was, not surprisingly, unmarked.  
  
"Only ten." he said with a soft sigh. Heero sank down into the down metal once again, dizzy from standing so quickly. His mind mulled dully over the fact that he'd sustained heavy damage during his last battle. Wing fared no better.  
  
Heero rested a hot hand on Wing's cool exterior and tried to stand again. He had to stand. He had to get up. He had to find Duo. He didn't want to regret any longer.  
  
He just wanted to be free.  
  
A few attempts at getting up proved useless. Heero lay still on the floor, unable to move any longer. He glanced ever upward at the darkened sky and let himself cry. It wasn't that he was sad, no. Just frustrated.  
  
"I finally get everything figured out." he paused to cough up a little blood, "but I can't do a damned thing about it." With the bitterest of laughs, Heero closed his Prussian blue eyes in an effort to fuse the real world with his dreams.  
  
"I want to go back. I want to live on the edge of my dreams for always. It will never be real, but at least I can go to you there. At least I can hold you there."  
  
Heero didn't hear the footsteps behind himself. He just lay on the ground, his head slightly propped up against Wing's mechanized foot, his eyes closed ever so lightly, and his lip trailing blood from the corner of his mouth.  
  
Moreover, Heero didn't feel the breaths come closer to his bleeding lips. Duo had been lucky to be alive from their last mission and, having maintained consciousness, he spent quite some time worrying and looking for his partner.  
  
"Heero." he called out softly, barely expecting a response. He took the Japanese boy into his arms and cradled him gently. Heero was, as he'd hoped, just on the edge of sleep, aware of his surroundings, yet strangely oblivious.  
  
"Duo.?" came the shaky voice of the boy in his arms. Duo merely put a finger to Heero's lips in an effort to silence him.  
  
"You've done enough talking, Heero. Looks like you have a concussion." Duo's voice trailed off as he mentally assessed the damage inflicted upon Wing's pilot. "Concentrate, Heero. Try to stay awake. for me, Heero. Stay awake." Duo's voice trickled away with the bitter tears that rolled down his pale cheeks.  
  
Heero merely laughed - a tiny, hardly audible laugh that was probably more of a sigh than anything else. He groped the air for something to hold and satisfied himself with clutching Duo's braid. Heero looked in Duo's direction with a sleep-filled gaze.  
  
".more than enough, Duo." Heero mumbled at him.  
  
"S-say again, Heero? What's more than enough?"  
  
Heero didn't respond. Instead, Heero, using Duo's braid, pulled the American boy's head down until Duo's teeth grazed Heero's neck.  
  
Duo tried to pull away - the shock of what was happening overwhelming his system - but Heero held him tightly to his neck. Duo began to panic. He bit Heero in an effort to wake him and make him stop. Heero loosened his grip on the American boy and whispered something that sounded vaguely like ".twelve."  
  
Duo merely looked at him inquisitively.  
  
"Duo, am I in a dream?"  
  
Duo shook his head furiously, still confused as to what Heero was up to.  
  
"Am I alive?"  
  
Duo gave a quick nod.  
  
"Are we free?"  
  
Duo couldn't respond.  
  
"Free from what, Heero?"  
  
Heero couldn't respond.  
  
After eons of silence, Duo shrugged and hoisted the Japanese boy over his shoulder, convinced that Heero needed medical attention first and foremost. Inside Deathscythe's cockpit, Duo tended to Heero's external wounds; cleaning them, disinfecting them, and finally wrapping in fresh bandages. While he treated the large gash in Heero's leg, Duo began to hum a light tune.  
  
It started meek, but grew in volume, never above a whisper.  
  
Heero recognized the tune instantly. It was the song he'd whispered to Duo in his dreams. It was déjà-vous; it was coincidence; it was luck; it was true.  
  
"Duo." Heero called out. Duo stopped humming and looked deeply into Prussian eyes. An expression of pure concern befell his delicate face. "Why do you look so sad?"  
  
Duo avoided Heero's eyes as he spoke. "'Cause, if you haven't noticed, Heero, you're not exactly in top condition. I don't know how bad your wounds are, but you obviously suffered some form of head trauma." Duo's voice trailed once more as Heero leaned closer to Duo.  
  
"Why do you say that?"  
  
Duo flushed crimson and took a gulp. "B-because the real Heero wouldn't act like this. The real Heero wouldn't act like loved me like." The two boys drew closer. "I." Their foreheads met. ".love." Duo's head tilted slightly. ".him." Their lips collided wonderfully with one another's in the ultimate crescendo of love.  
  
Duo pulled away and rested his head on Heero's shoulder, apologizing softly for taking advantage of Heero's weak mental state.  
  
Heero felt a few tears stain his shirt.  
  
"Duo." Heero began, lifting Duo's chin with a gentle hand. "If only in a lullaby, if only in a melody. If only in a memory, if only in goodbye.  
  
I love you most, if only in your smile."  
  
OWARI 


End file.
